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Jaded Insider Live Blogs The 2007 MTV VMAs


11:04: Timbaland, Nelly Furtado and Timberlake close out the show. The J.I. would really like those two hours of life back. Special thanks to the good folks at Jack Daniels for making this a tiny bit less horrible.

10:58: Video of the Year is ... Rihanna's "Umbrella." She's cute and the song is catchy, so J.I. is not too pissed.

10:56: Mary J. Blige gets choked up introducing ... Dr. Dre: "Please stand to your feet for him." Dre is wearing a thermal and jeans, and looked like he just came from watching his kids' soccer game.

10:49: The idiot girl from Miss Teen America talks like a robot and cashes in on her 15 minutes of fame.

10:47: The best new artist is ... Gym Class Fallout. Jennifer Garner is awesome for saying that. The band just screams and does shots.

10:45: Jennifer Garner would much rather be at home with Ben Affleck watching a Red Sox game right now. Also, Jamie Fox is a little bit wasted and rambling.

10:44: The Gym Class Heroes singer has really stupid piercings.

10:43: What the world needs now is a reality show about a spoiled kid who skateboards like I need a hole in my head.

10:40: "Girls start to get crazy when you have sex with them." Remember when "The Real World" did the Pedro has AIDS/social responsibility thing?

10:36: Alicia's George Michael cover is totally out of left field, but kind of awesome.

10:33: Alicia Keys is wearing gold boots and super-tight black pants that aren't doing her hips any favors. Her usually strong voice sounds pretty bad tonight.

10:25: Serj Tankian and the Foos do the Dead Kennedys' "Holiday in Cambodia." They get 30 seconds of screen time. Lame.

10:23: Adrian Grenier looks like he just rolled out of a brunch joint in Fort Greene. He gives Fall Out Boy the award for Best Group. Pete Wentz wears a lizard mask on the back of his head.

10:21: The Jaded Insider needs perspective, and finds it in a New York Times article entitled "Drugs Banned, World’s Poor Suffer in Pain."

10:20: Linkin Park are overshadowed by their laser light show. The lead singer wears sunglasses that make him look like he belongs in Rammstein (the band, not the terrorist target military base).

10:18: The chick from "Transformers" got lost on the way to the AVN Awards.

10:17: Fall Out Boy plus rappers equals total mess. This sounds freaking horrible. Pete Wentz is scatting.

10:11: Kanye plays another song in the club at the Palms. He's not bad but the lighting is super janky.

10:09: Pamela Anderson tells a disgusting story about making out with Kanye West in a desert. J.I.'s opinion of Kanye just tanked.

10:07: Shia LeBouf gives away the name of the new Indiana Jones movie ("Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull"). Then, weirdly, Fergie wins best female performance, but is not there, and Ludacris is supposed to accept for her, but does not. Shia finally takes the award and walks off. Train. Wreck.

10:05: Justin and Fiddy are performing "Ayo Technology" together. The camera operators are on crack. Someone on another blog just pointed that it is only 8 p.m. in Vegas and yet it looks like it is dark outside all the hotel rooms. Hmmm...

9:58: Justin Timberlake wins "Male Artist of the Year." The JI is pretty sure he's rolling his brains out. He loves on Chris Brown, who has been the best thing about this show so far.

9:51: Vince Vaughn and Paul Giamatti did a family movie about Santa. The J.I. is guessing there were all sorts of blizzards happening at the North Pole.

9:50: What the hell is a "scripted drama?"

9:48: More Chris Brown. The crowd goes nuts. The J.I. is a little less jaded.

9:46: Rhianna comes out doing "Umbrella" and dances with Chris. She's wearing a stupid bodysuit but is otherwise solid. Could this be turning around?

9:44: Chris Brown and his dancers breakdance on tables. He sounds and looks great, though -- this is totally one of the highlights of the evening.

9:38: "The Real World" is pretty much nothing more than softcore porn at this point.

9:34: Beyonce and Shakira win in a triumph for sexy ladies who know how to shake their booties everywhere.

9:33: Kanye and Fiddy come out to present the "Earth-Shattering Collaboration" award and stare at each other. Man, if they'd starting making out, that would have been awesome.

9:31: Foo Fighters are rocking out. MTV cameras mostly focus on their smoking hot female cellist.

9:28: Jason is back on "The Hills!" He's totally the new Mr. Big.

9:24: Justin Timberlake wins, jumps around like a loon, and tells MTV to play more videos. We then cut to Fall Out Boy playing in another hotel room. The JI's significant other has bailed and is hiding in the other room, probably considering finding a new person to date.

9:23: Robin Thicke hits on Jennifer Hudson and they present the "Quadruple Threat of the Year" award.

9:21: The kids from "Superbad" present the list of nominees for Best New Artist while sitting behind a table. They've pretty much stopped trying.

9:14: Kanye is playing at the club in the Palms. Everyone has the striped glasses on.

9:12: The Monster Single of the Year is..."Umbrella." Rihanna is wearing a prom dress from 1986. She thanks all her fans and the label and the network. Boring.

9:11: Pete Wentz has technical difficulties with his mic. He is surrounded by strippers and someone in a giant rabbit suit.

9:09: Mark Ronson is the house DJ. That's what being related to Lindsay Lohan's friend/drug dealer gets you.

9:07: Sarah Silverman makes a joke about mistaking Cee-Lo for Kanye West. Did Kanye get fat?

9:05: Sarah Silverman makes a bunch of Britney jokes to muted laughter. And by muted, I mean "none."

9:04: "Ladies and gentlemen"...the definition of "anti-climactic."

9:01: Britney is phoning it in. She looks distracted and her song sounds pretty awful, but she's hitting all her cues and didn't fall on her face, so I guess that's a victory of sorts.

September 9, 2007 | Permalink


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Sarah Silverman is a BEOTCH...yes, Britney sucked, but please...human decency, don't kick the girl when she is already in the gutter. And did you hear what she said to Paris....OMG. SS better watch her back.

Posted by: courtney | Sep 9, 2007 9:37:19 PM

If that was not a brilliant PR tactic by Britney, then it truly was one of the most embarrassing things I've ever seen. By coming out and doing...whatever she just did...Britney sent a clear message to the media, who has spent the weekend speculating about how bad she could possibly be. She HAD to want to be saying, You wanna give me a prime gig like opening the VMAs just to see me look like a fool, I'll show you how foolish I can look. Cause then, who's the joke on? Her, or the network?

Posted by: John | Sep 9, 2007 9:46:56 PM

Was it just me, or did it not even look like Britney was singing live?

Posted by: Jennifer | Sep 9, 2007 9:47:32 PM

Uh, does she EVER sing live? That was terrible.. so anti-climactic.

Posted by: Tommy Shanks | Sep 9, 2007 9:51:53 PM

You are right - It looked like she was nervous or confused or something - i was not impressed.

Posted by: Laura | Sep 9, 2007 9:52:24 PM

Clearly she wasn't, Jennifer. How could she? She never would have been good enough, or skinny enough, or have projected enough star-quality. So she went out and gave nothing, did NOTHING. Like I said above, I'm not convinced the joke's not on us.

Posted by: John | Sep 9, 2007 9:54:29 PM

And now Justin wins EVERYTHING. It's all so brilliant, can't you already picture these scenes in her eventual Lifetime bio-pic? I still love my MTV.

Posted by: John | Sep 9, 2007 9:58:36 PM

was that really an ad for a new bi-sexual-themed reality show coming this Fall to mtv?

Posted by: John | Sep 9, 2007 10:02:55 PM

why am i blogging more than the billboard live-blogger?

Posted by: John | Sep 9, 2007 10:03:54 PM

Maybe he tipped over and fell asleep..I keep refreshing thinking maybe I was missing something.

Posted by: Laura | Sep 9, 2007 10:12:26 PM

The blog is being updated every half hour. Also, don't assume the JI is a dude. Girls know how to write about music, too.

Posted by: Jaded Insider | Sep 9, 2007 10:14:52 PM

wow....way to take things personal JI dude/dudette

Posted by: Jane | Sep 9, 2007 10:22:57 PM

the vmas are always good for a little sunday night time wastin every year but this year was, dear lord, horrific. more horrific than ever. the sound quality of the live sets in the vegas rooms were painful. mtv is so dead. deader than dead. nothing interesting. i could film a better show with my friends in my back yard.

Posted by: emillion | Sep 9, 2007 11:14:27 PM

9/09/2007, the night MTV died..... Good-bye old friend.

Posted by: Dino | Sep 9, 2007 11:40:46 PM

I missed the beginning and just watched the Britney/Sarah Silverman bit which was what I was most looking forward to seeing - train wreck and poking fun of the train wreck - but it was so bad it wasn't even funny. It was just bad. Britney didn't even comb her hair. She clunked around the stage like she was playing the tree (albeit a whorish tree) in an elementary school play. Watching the dancers feel her up was like walking in on your parents having sex. Gross.

Did you at least get paid to watch/blog the VMAs? I think MTV should send money to anyone who sat through that travesty of an award show.

Posted by: emillion | Sep 9, 2007 11:50:04 PM

Brit was either high or drunk-I felt badly for the dancers around her who were moving around giving it their best while she just sort of stood there, shuffling from side to side like a deer caught in headlights. Okay, a fat drunk deer in headlights. Well, okay, a fat drunk/high deer in a bikini standing in headlights...

Posted by: kim | Sep 10, 2007 2:34:12 AM

The Foo Fighters "smoking hot female cellist", is the amazing Jessy Greene []

Posted by: Sara | Sep 10, 2007 12:50:31 PM

Which, if any of the songs featured would be worth paying more than $.99 for? It's no wonder the industry has tanked...maybe deservedly so.

Posted by: grinder | Sep 10, 2007 12:51:45 PM

The whole show BIT. I kept trying to get into it. The chaotic shots of the little localized jam parties were poorly shot and unless you were there, they were totally a waste of time. Sarah Silverman should hide from this performance. Missed Britney (boy am I glad). This show is what I would expect from BET, budget and quality-wise. Oh well, I guess everyone involved got laid last night or this morning sometime, so there is that "success"...

Posted by: Scotto | Sep 10, 2007 3:38:56 PM

The whole show BIT. I kept trying to get into it. The chaotic shots of the little localized jam parties were poorly shot and unless you were there, they were totally a waste of time. Sarah Silverman should hide from this performance. Missed Britney (boy am I glad). This show is what I would expect from BET, budget and quality-wise. Oh well, I guess everyone involved got laid last night or this morning sometime, so there is that "success"...

Posted by: Scotto | Sep 10, 2007 3:39:02 PM

That was the worst VMA's I've ever seen the format was everywhere-but the Foo's were awesome.

Posted by: Amy A | Sep 11, 2007 11:08:21 AM

Oh JI stop licking Kanye's arse. He doesn't deserve it.

Posted by: Patrick | Sep 11, 2007 3:15:41 PM

are you serious that you didn't get the joke of sarah silverman of kanye/cee-lo? what kind of blogger are you? your jokes are tired and sound really unprepared to do a blog of the VMAs... get better references

Posted by: D.B | Sep 12, 2007 2:24:51 PM

I have been watching the VMA'S for over 15 years that had to be the worst and I think this is my last year. What the hell was britney doing? can anyone elaborate on that.

Posted by: Katty | Sep 13, 2007 10:41:58 AM

Katty, Britney was tryin to screw ur ass! I believe ur a girl.. a fat ugly girl who just sits and comments on what others do.. can u do .00005% of what britney managed to do? I believe NO. But you manage to be the best critic and comment assholicly.
I'm not a BIG britney fan.. but im pissed at innumerable posts [here and many more places] talkin abt how bad britney performed. Even if she had performed well, you guys would have criticized something or the other. The plan fact is that you want to vent out your shit.

Posted by: Nic | Sep 14, 2007 1:40:35 PM

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